How do I confess a sin that I don't feel bad for?

A person that blatantly sins and does not feel bad about it is (1) either not saved, or (2) they have responded to the gospel but have a badly seared conscience (1Tim.4:2), or a rebellious mind that desperately needs to be renewed by the life and love of the Word of God.

To start answering your question, I must draw your attention to the fact that we have the known moral (or universal) sins like, murder, stealing, adultery, bearing false witness, coveting, etc. The Bible is clear that these are sins and any spirit-led believer will know that they sin if they do these, whether they feel bad or not!

But, what about sins that are not clearly listed in the Bible? How do we actually know “what is sin?” In other words, if you do not know you are sinning, you will not feel bad! Right? If you are not being convicted of doing wrong, by that ‘bad’ feeling, then are you actually doing wrong? Well, no ——unless its those moral sins listed above!

So, to answer “what is sin”, it will come from the conviction of the Holy Spirit. Understand that the moment you are saved, by receiving the grace gospel by faith, you are regenerated in spirit and the Holy Spirit (who indwells your heart and seals you to redemption) will lead you in regards to sin and righteousness, convicting you when you fall into wrongdoing. This conviction is the sense of wrong or bad or failure that your question eludes to.

Something else to note then is that sin therefore works on an individual basis. Sin is activated in the individual based on them ignoring the convictions of the Holy Spirit within them. This is why Paul says, “…he that doubteth [this conviction] is damned, because he [does that action] not of [or responding to that] faith: for whatsoever is not of faith is sin.”

Regarding sin, Paul says, "Let each be fully convinced in his own mind." This is a profound statement, and it is this that answers your question. If I light up a cigarette (for example) and get a gnawing conviction in my heart that its wrong, yet I continue to puff away, then I am sinning! To me it is sin because I am denying the morality of my heart, that warning flag of sin and wrongdoing. Because I continue to do this while my conviction is shouting out and sending up red flags, my conscience gets violated and sin gets activated. Does the bible say that smoking is a sin? No. Not directly. But the bible does tell us (by inspired words through Paul's writing) that doing something against your personal moral conviction is sin, (see Romans 14:2-5, 22-23).

Is smoking a sin for someone else? Well, if they are not actively being convicted of it at that time, then no! For them, smoking is NOT a sin. The Holy Spirit might be working in their lives on other matters and will later get to that smoking issue, or whatever else!! We are all at a different position in our path of sanctification.

If someone is telling you that smoking is a sin, but you are genuinely not ‘yet’ being convicted of it in your heart, in other words, (as Paul says in Rom.14:22, he that condemneth not himself in that thing which he alloweth, then you will not have that ‘bad’ feeling or conviction. In this case there is nothing to confess or feel sorry about…..until you do start getting convicted of it! Until you get convicted of it, you are not sinning by smoking.

It all comes down to your heart and your conviction. Sin is sin when you violate the conviction in your heart. If you are saved, that conviction will certainly be there. The Holy Spirit will actively be working in you to slowly and methodically align your life to reflect Jesus Christ. Our walk as a Christian is by faith in these convictions (of sin and of righteousness). This is what we call, “walking in the Spirit”. Our lives are to bring glory and honour to Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit will help us in this quest as we give over to His workings and life within us.